The women are gorgeous. Educated. Smart. And they’re interested in Western husbands. All it takes is a few clicks on a Russian marriage agency website and you can be in touch with a dozen potential wives. It sounds too good to be true. Is there a catch?
The short answer is … maybe. A Russian marriage agency is nothing more than a matchmaking service that uses the Internet to help Western men find brides in Russia and other countries of the former Soviet Union. Matchmaking services are nothing new – they’ve been around as long as marriage has. The reason is simple: demand is strong, from both men and women.
But there are risks for everyone involved. Scam artists take advantage of both the men and women through fake agencies. Some women are out to bilk Western men, and some of the men just want a sex holiday in Russia. But with a little research, planning, and common sense, these risks can be managed.
How Russian Marriage Agencies Work
Although practices vary from agency to agency, the basic process is as follows:
- Russian women register with an agency, which posts their profiles on the Internet.
- Foreign men browse the profiles online. They correspond with women who interest them through the site.
- In some agencies, men can also post a profile, allowing women to contact them.
- Both men and women correspond with a number of potential mates.
- Eventually, face-to-face meetings take place. Most often, the Western man goes on a “marriage tour” organized by the agency. The idea is that he can meet a number of women he has been writing to in one trip.
- The list of potential partners is honed down.
- If all goes well, a romance is sparked and a couple is born, eventually leading to marriage.
How Agencies Make Money
Marriage agencies make money at almost every phase of the process. It’s important to know what their incentives are – they do not always have the clients’ best interests at heart.
- Women pay fees to enter their profiles.
- Men pay fees for the right to contact the women, charging fees to forward correspondence.
- Because many women do not know English, the agency collects a fee for translation services and for forwarding correspondence.
- Many agencies charge for gift delivery.
- Agencies offer multiple services, for a fee, for men who go on marriage tours, including accommodation, tickets, translators.
- The agency’s websites often have ads – often for other marriage agency sites.
- Agencies also peddle profiles or photos of women, sometimes without their knowledge or consent.
Many marriage agencies provide these services professionally and for reasonable fees. But there are also many opportunities for dishonest agencies to extract cash from the men, women, or both.
What to Look for in a Russian Marriage Agency
Before taking the first step, consider what might motivate a woman to seek a foreign husband and make sure you’re comfortable with that. Then decide if you want to go with an international agency or a local one. An international agency may seem like a safer route to go, but these agencies operate from a distance and do not have personal contact with their women clients. Local agencies can potentially provide much more personalized service.
If you decide to work with a Russian marriage agency, do your research and ask a lot of questions. Here are some things to look for:
- Name and contact information of the owner. The better sites clearly state who owns them and provides a local physical address, phone numbers, and e-mail. Be wary of agencies with an address is an off-shore tax haven or which only has overseas contact information. When you do get a phone number, try Googling it. Also, check to see if the e-mail address uses their own domain. Serious businesses don’t use free sites, like Yahoo! or Mail.ru.
- Women of varying appearances and ages. If all the women in the database are drop-dead gorgeous, be suspicious, especially if they’re in sexy poses. In real life, a number of women seeking foreign husbands will be in their 30s, 40s, even 50s. Some of them will pretty, but many will be average or plain. A legitimate site is more likely to have a variety of types.
- Reasonably prices services. If any Russian marriage agency offers their services at low or no cost, it is likely to be a scam. Free service is bait, and won’t be free in the long run.
- Clear process for selecting women clients. The best agencies interview each women in person and verify their identities. They get an idea of what the woman is like, which helps with the human side of matchmaking. Try to avoid agencies that act as go-betweens and don’t come into contact with women clients. This is where local agencies have an advantage over large, international ones.
- Optional services that are really optional. Good agencies will offer all services needed to help make a match, but won’t insist that you use them. For example, many will arrange local accommodation and translation services. But they should not object if you can make your own arrangements. If they do, be suspicious.
- Willingness to answer questions. Picking a wife is serious business, and mistakes are costly. So ask a lot of questions. Good agencies will answer them. Bad ones will get irritated with you or will not be able to provide good answers. If this happens, walk away.
- Referrals. Don’t be afraid to ask for referrals from past clients. Good agencies will be glad to give them to you – what could be better than free advertising?
- Positive reviews in dating forums and local English-language newspapers. Some online searching should bring up information from independent sources. Local English language papers write about marriage agencies from time to time, and clients often share their experiences in online forums.
Some agencies are set up solely to separate lonely Western men from their money. The main way to do this is through the services they offer. For example:
- Some agencies don’t have actual women in their database. Instead, they post fake profiles of beautiful women and have people write romantic e-mails to Western men. Some of these ghost writers are actually men. Then the agency charges for translations and for forwarding the messages. Some even solicit gifts.
- In other cases, the agency intentionally mis-translates correspondence so that potential brides appear to recommend their services.
- They charge exorbitant rates for their travel services. Sometimes the woman recommends specific travel agencies, hotels or apartments. It’s easy to check what normal rates are for tickets or accommodations.
- Some make bogus requests for cash to pay for trips, visas or other expenses to visit you. Then, the non-existent woman comes up with reasons for not visiting.
In brief, if you are ever asked for money beyond the stated fees, or if the fees seem unreasonable, it is probably a scam. If the potential bride makes these requests, report it to the agency. An honest agency will take action.
Summing Up
If you’re interested in finding a foreign wife, Russian marriage agencies are definitely an option to look at. Don’t be put off by the risks; instead, use common sense and manage them. If anything smells fishy, it probably is. But if you do your homework, you might end up with a fabulous life partner.
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David Lawrence - I have been working in development for nearly 20 years, mainly in the former Soviet Union, but also in Indonesia (Aceh) and Mongolia. For ...
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